Who gets to play? Who gets to study?

Today was a slow start. I had some cereal and then went to class, again, without doing the reading. I got somewhat dejected with today's lesson and again sought some more "hopeful" consciousness in dreaming about leaving school and living in a different country for a year. I kinda held onto this muse as I went to Roma later on for a muffin and tea. I ran into Derrick, and he did have some wise words to me that if I did not feel like going to school, I probably should not.

A huge change in attitude came later on as I warmed up for brass studio, and although it may seem obvious, it grew on to me more and more how important the trombone has been to my life. It is as if the time with the trombone and myself is a time "for me," and the more I have played lately, the more I want to just sound better and better and actually perform. I started dreaming some schemes of going out to some run-down areas in Denver and giving trombone lessons for free to those individuals who want to learn. I feel that music could serve as a really important tool for social communication.

I do not think such things came to mind to others in a talk during studio today. We had a woman from the entrepreneurial department come give a talk about music careers for us, and every single one of them felt as if it was a subservient role towards the professionals, the business people, and the people who have the "privilege" for being part of this whole musical world. I guess I just had a lot of disagreement with the minds of some of the students there.

I vented out some emotions with more practice afterwards, and then I went home to grab a bite to eat before jazz rehearsal. Jazz today was good, the chops were good, and I just "felt" the music and fostered my appreciation for Count Basie. Afterwards, I went to a study session for tomorrow's theory exam. I am a little weary on sequences, but everything else should be pretty good.

SXSW is growing closer, and I still have not gotten back in touch with Liz and Angella. And tomorrow's schedule is filling up fast.

Oh well. I will be flying out here by Thursday morning. And man if there has not been a better time for me to get the hell outta here.

-c